Late Sunday night, when a certain G&G girl couldn’t sleep, she found herself watching the E! network. Little did she know, that she soon would be puking in her mouth.
“Jersey Shore: Unleashed” zipped onto the screen. Need I say more?
After 10 minutes of jaw dropping shock and disgust, she was convinced this was not real.
For a weekend at a time, the show follows 6 fake tanned broads prancing around on the beach, going out to, “like the sickest clubs, WOOOO 118!”
The real kicker is the 40 second blurbs between scenes, where boys (yes, boys) from various clubs and bars are asked questions like, “how do you get your hair like that?” where they go into full detail of the steps of waxing and gelling to achieve that blown out affect.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, this show is pretty douchey.
Apparently America can’t get enough of this smelly state and spray tanned residents, or at least Bravo thinks so, because premiering tonight is “The Real House Wives of New Jersey.”
Now now now, don’t get confused, true G&G girls are classy and do not judge individuals based on their appearance or where they are from. But, if the heels fit, and you still can’t walk in them… Get a tissue box, “babe.”
If you miss the premier tonight at 11pm, don’t panic, it’ll be on continuously for the next week. So, if you need an extra helping of tongue curling and slurred speech, pseudo mafia “blood is thicker than water” bullshit, and orange skin goodness… Check your local listings.
