I’ve been retired from the dating game for awhile now (#oldlady) but I still like to keep up with what the kids are doing these days. So I stay current by perusing all the single ladies’ advice on boys and the pursuit thereof.
Each one of them is chock full of dating tricks and relationship secrets that they are eager to share with us. Never mind the fact that they are also single, they still know what’s best.
Except they don’t! Don’t listen to them!
Sometimes they say horrible things, like this gem I came across tonight, #7 on a list of 10 “Truths No One Will Tell You.” Psh. This girl advises, “Treat love like you do books. When it gets boring, or too complicated, put it down. Skip to the end.”
What kind of crazytown thing is that to tell all the single girls? I suppose it could be good advice for your first few dates, because if you’re bored by date two, well, then sure, call it quits. But geez louise, if you can’t handle some boredom and complications, you can’t handle a long-term relationship. Because you will be bored sometimes. Things like laundry and grocery shopping are simply boring – no matter how much you love the person you’re doing them with. As your relationship matures, you might even start to prefer “boring.” A night snuggling on the couch with ice cream and a new episode of “Alaska:The Last Frontier” becomes the best night ever.
And “too complicated?” – even the strongest, most “meant-to-be” relationships get complicated sometimes. It’s easy to be in a relationship when it’s just the two of you in your little “love cocoon.” A true test of what your love is made of is how you deal with all of life’s surprises and complications. And trust me, there are plenty of them. Kids, ex-wives, unemployment, long-distance stints, finances…all complicated things! But when you work through them together, complications will only make your relationship stronger.
While they are certainly not the most awesome parts of a relationship, boredom and complications are definitely not things to run from. And absolutely not a reason to “skip to the end” of your story.